Flaunt Your Talent
In my high school years, one of my most dreaded, anxiety-ridden, miserable moments happened while practicing in the marching band. When it comes to how seriously people take their marching band, there is a wide range out there. Some schools will perform their halftime show by simply walking onto the field, play a song or two, and then walk off. Other bands will march using a military style with abundant precision, and the band director might be a little crazy and demand lots and lots of practice and effort and will use any means necessary to get their students to practice, practice, practice. My high school marching band director was more like the second one, but maybe only a little more demanding. Some of this comes due to our being in southeast Texas, where the high school football game is a community-wide event. Some of it comes from an intensely driven high school band director.
This dreaded moment that I’m talking about is this time that would occur every Thursday before the big game on Friday. He had this little activity he called “Flaunt Your Talent.” Ugh. He had a bag with everyone’s name in it. He would pick a name out of the bag, and whatever name he drew, that person and their fellow squad mates — squads had a total of four people in them — would do the halftime show for everyone in the band, all by themselves. We had 200 students in our band. It was huge. The thing about marching by yourself on an empty field is that you lose all of the guideposts, the cues that you normally have. Knowing when to go, when to stop, when to march in place — all of that was much harder when doing it by yourself, in front of 10 percent of the school. You don’t have everyone else playing the song. Just you and your squad mates.
What made it even harder was all of the nervousness that built up before going out and marching by yourself. Once he drew the name, he wouldn’t just say the name. He would say, “This person doesn’t play the tuba.” All of the tuba players would sigh in relief, except for those tuba players that had non-tuba players in their squad. They were still winding up their anxiety. It’s just a matter of time before your squad gets picked. You walk out there in front of all the people that will remember this moment for years to come. Your nervousness makes you start to tremble a little bit. You start playing, and it sounds terrible, because you’re shaking so much. Then you start walking, and the more mistakes you make, the more the anxiety ramps up, the more you shake, the more you sound terrible, the more you forget what you’re doing. Such a miserable experience.
I was wondering how I could share this experience. I did eventually come up with something. I could call it “Flaunt your love of God.” We could, I’m not saying we will, I’m just saying we could, put everyone’s name in a giant fish net. Then I could draw a name, and then, whoever’s name gets picked, we would get into the buses waiting out front and go to their home for a nice little surprise inspection. We could study the art they have on the wall, or all the things in the bedside dresser. We could see how intensely they love God with all the choices they make in their personal lives. How does that sound? Are you in? Anybody?
Some of you might be wondering what any of this has to do with the Trinity. You might be surprised to learn that all of it relates very closely to the Trinity.
When we make choices, like how we’re going to decorate our homes, what we’re going to hang on the walls, what we’re going to store in our bedside drawers, all of these things reflect our values and what we think is important. In other words, the choices that we make in our creations, if you will, those choices reflect our nature. For example, if you really love horses, then the odds are pretty good that you’re going to have some horse art in your home. And visitors to your home would learn about how important horses are to you. They’d see horse pictures, horse statues, maybe books about horses on your coffee table. Just by visiting your home, we’d learn so much about you, because it would reflect who you are. It would reflect your nature.
Well, the same is true when we look at creation. Creation reflects the nature of God. God created everything, so it only makes sense that it would reflect his nature. One simple example is the atom. The word “atom” comes from the word atomic, which means a single irreducible unit. And it’s such a coincidence how the atom is made. We have the nucleus with the neutrons and protons, then there are the electrons that orbit the nucleus, and then there’s the force between the protons and the electrons that holds the whole thing together. The atom is one. If you take it apart, it is no longer an atom. Only when the atom is complete with its protons, electrons, and the force between them is it a single thing. In a way, the atom reflects the nature of the Trinity. God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit, they are one in being. Three persons, one God. Unlike the atom, God cannot be taken apart. So the reflection of God in creation is there, but creation is not God.
God’s reflection in nature is everywhere. These candles, the light they give off occurs when the electrons come closer to the protons. At Pentecost, we received the Holy Spirit, which was indicated to us as tongues of fire. Jesus ascended to the Father, and the Holy Spirit descended. It’s a lot like the way light in a candle flame works. God’s nature is reflected in creation.
This concept of three persons united in one being is very well understood by us. We have the experience of different aspects of our being coming together and making up who we are. In my band example, there are the thoughts that we have. “I’m going to look stupid. What is the next note again? Where am I supposed to turn?” There are the emotions. “I’m scared. I’m annoyed.” And then there is the body. Why is it shaking so much? That doesn’t help at all. It just makes everything worse. It doesn’t make sense to us to think about our being apart from our body, apart from our thoughts, apart from our emotions. Together, they are one. They come together to make us who we are. We are one being. In that way, we reflect the Trinity. Three persons, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, they are one in being.
We have an amazing God who has given us an amazing life. Everything that we have comes to us through his creation. His reflection is all over the place. If someone can see it in a simple candle flame, certainly you can see it in yourself. If God put his reflection in creation, it means he wants to be known. By you. If God created you in such a way that you might have some idea about the nature of the Trinity — three persons, one in being — he wants you to know him. I ask you to consider saying this to God in your prayer: God, I trust you want to be known by me. I ask you, please show me who you are.
If your name might be drawn and the body is already shaking, start before the name is drawn. On Thursday he did not say the name. He said, “This person doesn’t play the tuba,” and the fear already had a job. Write the opinion you are already assigning to the other people. They will think I am stupid. They will remember this for years. That opinion has not been spoken by anyone yet. You wrote it for them.
Then write what is actually being asked. Four people. One song. An empty field. Not a judgment on your life. If you cannot name what is being asked, you are still inside the prediction.
Say this once, and do not wait to feel it. God made you, thoughts and fear and shaking together, as one person. That is already true. The other people cannot add to it or take it away. A poor performance does not change it. The prayer from this homily is enough here. God, I trust you want to be known by me. Please show me who you are.
Do the next small piece while you are still shaking. Do not wait for the body to settle. He started playing, the shaking made it sound terrible, and the terrible playing made the shaking worse. The way through is not to hide the shake. It is to play the next note anyway. If the thing in front of you is a conversation, say the next sentence. If it is a meeting, stay for the next ten minutes.
Afterward, write two lines. What you predicted they would think. What they actually did. Most of the time they did not remember it, and they did not treat you differently the next day. That comparison is what shrinks the fear. The sentence about how God made you does not shrink it by itself. The next time you are asked, you will have a record that the prediction was larger than what happened.
The house inspection was a joke. God is not drawing your name to look through the bedside drawer. He wants to be known by you. The fear does not have to leave before you take the next step.
This is a pastoral reflection, not clinical care and not a substitute for it. If you or someone you love is in immediate danger, call 988 or local emergency services.Drawn from a homily first preached in 2021. 